Abashakanye bifuza kuremya urugo bagahorana umunezero bagomba guharanira kubaho bakora ibintu 15 tugiye kubagezaho muri inkuru.
Abahanga mu bijyanye n’Iyobokamana bavuga ko urugo rwiza ari Ijuru rito. Benshi bakunda kuvuga ko urugo kandi ari ishuri ritabamo umuhanga kuko uwushatse kwigira intyoza ruramutamaza. Niyo mpamvu twahisemo kubagezaho amwe mu mabanga yafasha buri wese kurema urugo rugasugira ndetse rugasagamba.
1) Menya ko nta muntu w’Intungane Buri wese akura bavuga ko intungane bwira icumuye karindwi. Buri muntu wese ashobora gukora amakosa, niyo mpamvu niba wubatse urugo ukaba ufite umugore cyangwa umugabo, menya ko uwo mwashakanye atari umutagatifu ahubwo ari umuntu ushobora gukosa.
Icyo usabwa igihe uwo mwashakanye yakoze ikosa, wimwuka inabi. Niba ugiranye ikibazo n’uwo mwashakanye irinde kumutuka, mwereke amakosa utamushyize ku nkeke.
Gushinjanya amakosa bikurura intonganya bigakurura amakimbirane mu miryango ndetse usanga ariyo ntandaro yo gutandukana ku bashakanye.
2)Ugomba kumva vuba ndetse ukirinda urusaku
Niba ushaka kubaka urugo uzirinde uburangare no kutumva vuba. Ugomba kumvira uwo mwashakanye utamugisha impaka zidashira. Irinde gusakuza igihe akubwiye ibidasonutse ahubwo shaka uburyo mwashyikirana mu mahoro, bizatuma mukemura ibibazo byanyu mu mudendezo ntawuhungabanye.
3) Ntuzigere uhangana n’umugabo
Bagore, muzirinde guhangana n’abagabo banyu by’umwihariko muzi ko umugore ari we mutima w’urugo. Uramenye ko guhangana n’umugabo byakuviramo kurusenya ndetse abagabo bamwe bakunda guhunga ingo zabo, bagaragaza ko batanze amahoro mu rugo!
Muri kamere y’umugabo aba yumva ko ntawamuvugiramo. Ikindi niba umugabo akoze ikintu uzirinde nawe kumwigana kuko isosa umugore akoze rigira ingaruka zishobora kuba karande zikagera no ku bana.
Kugira ngo iyi ngingo yumvikane neza dufata urugero: umugore ashobora kunanirwa kwihangana umugabo we yasambana nawe akabikora ibi bigira ingaruka ku muryango wose nubwo abagabo nabo bakwiye kwirinda ubusambanyi, Abagore bakwiye kutabikora barimo bahangana! Guhangana muri ubwo buryo kandi bivamo amakimbirane ya karande.
4) Ntuzigere ugerageza kugaragariza uwo mwashakanye ko umurusha gukora inshingano
Kirazira kwereka uwo mwashakanye ko udahari urugo rwahungabana. Niba uri umugore kuba ufite ubushobozi bwo gukemura ibibazo byananiye umugabo kubikemura ntuzigereranye n’umugabo nubwo umugabo nawe atagomba gushinga ijosi ngo aharire umugore inshingano kubera ko ariwe ukora nawe agomba kudahararira uwo bashakanye inshingano zo gutunga urugo.
Umugabo ukora umugore we nta kazi ntakwiye kumva ko avunishwa nuwo bashakanye kuko uwo mugore nawe hari inshingano aba yasigayemo mu rugo nazo ziremereye kandi zifite akamaro mu muryango.
5) Jya wihutira gusaba imbabazi wakosheje
Nk’uko twatangiye tubivuga umuntu ashobora gukosa ariko urugo rwubakwa no guca bugufi, kwihanganirana bityo kuvuga mbabarira igihe wakosheje bikaba ingenzi. Usaba imbabazi agomba kwirinda gusaba imbabazi abikoranye buryarya.
6. Jya uba inyangamugayo n’umunyakuri
Uzirinde ibinyoma uharanira kuba inyangamugayo . Ni byiza kubwiza ukuri uwo mwashakanye kuko kubakira urugo ku binyoma ni nko gutinya gukanda ikibyimba kandi ushaka ko gikira.kubaka urugo bisaba gukorera mu mucyo ntuhishe uwo mwashakanye ngo umubeshye .
7. Kumenya ibiryo uwo mwashakanye akunda
Mugore, jya umenya ibiribwa n’ibinyobwa uwo mwashakanye akunda kandi ubitegure mu mafunguro nibura inshuro ebyiri mu cyumweru niba mufite ubushobozi bwo kubigura. Ibi bireba n’abagabo ,nabo bagomba kuzirikana indyo ikundwa n’abagore babo bakajya babihahira.
8) Gukorera hamwe igenamigambi
Abashakanye bagomba gukorera hamwe igenamigambi. Ibi bituma badasesagura umutungo w’urugo. Iyo abashakanye barimo gukorera hamwe igenamigambi, bibafasha kunga ubumwe no guhuza imbaraga mu micungire y’umutungo. Umuryango ukorera hamwe igenamigambi biwufasha kumenya uko bashaka ibisubizo ku bibazo bafite ndetse bikabera imbarutso yo kwiteza imbere.
9) Ugomba kuba umujyanama w’urugo
Abashakanye ntibagomba kubaho batanga Amategeko gusa ahubwo bagomba kumenya ko umwe ari umujyanama w’undii. Umugabo ni umugore bagomba kumenya ko ari abajyanama b’abana babo bigatuma babatega amatwi bakabumva.
10. Ntibakwiye kwibagirwa ko umugore ari umufasha w’umugabo.
Mugore jya umenya ko uri umufasha w’umugabo wawe umufashe gutuza no gushyira ubwenge ku gihe. Umugabo nawe agomba kumenya ko umugore ari umuntu w’ingenzi mu buzima bwe akumva inama ze ndetse akanamwubaha muri byose.
11.Ntugigere usimbuza abana bawe uwo mwashakanye
Kwita ku bana ni inshingano z’abashakanye bombi ariko abashakanye Ntibakwiye kwibagirwa ko buri wese agomba kwita kubo bashakanye. Umugabo cyangwa umugore afite inshingano zo kwita kuwo bashakanye ariko ntinyibagirwe urukundo rwabo rukomezwa nuko hagati yabo bahora bashaka icyatuma bahorana umunezero.
Niba utashye ugomba gutungura uwo mwashakanye nkuko utekereza gutahana bombi ,imigati n’ibisuguti by’abana burya umugore cyangwa umugabo wawe ntibyamugwa nabi kumenya akantu akunda wamugurira kandi bituma arushaho kukwiyumvamo.
12. Abagore bagomba kumenya kumwenyura imbere y’abagabo babo.
Bagore mumenye ko abagabo bakunda umugore ubasekera akamwenyura . Nusekera umugabo wawe uzarushaho kwigarurira umutima we . Irinde kuzinga umunya imbere y’umugabo wawe .
Umugabo wawe nutamusekera aho agenda ashobora guhura n’abazi kwerekana inyinya bakamwigarurira.
13. Gerageza guhobera umugabo wawe.
Bagore mugomba kujya mwakirana urugwiro abagabo banyu igihe batashye mujye mubereka ko mubishimiye cyane kandi munabahobere cyane.Ibi bizatuma umugabo wawe akubonamo umunezero ndetse nubwo yaba yateretaga abandi bagore azabona ko nta gishya bafite niba anaguharika azakugarukira areke ubushoreke.
14. Niba umugabo wawe arakaye irinde gushyogozanya nawe.
Mugore igihe ubona ko umugabo wawe yarakaye jya wirinda gushyogozanya nawe, ahubwo ceceka urume giha kugeza atuje .Akenshi abagabo kubera kwiyumvamo ubutware n’ubudahangarwa mu rugo iyo avuze amagambo mabi ukamusubiza aba yumva umusuzuguye.
15. Ntukageraranye urugo rwawe n’izindi ngo.
Abashakanye bagomba kwirinda gushaka kubaho nk’uko abandi babaho.Umugore agomba kumenya kunyurwa n’imiterere by’umugabo we ndetse akanyurwa n’ubuzima babayemo. Umugabo nawe agomba kumenya kunyurwa n’umugore we ntamugereranye n’abo mu ngo za bagenzi be mu myifatire n’umuco ahubwo agaharanira kumwubakamo ikizere.
Ariko kandi abashakanye bagomba kugira isuku muri byose,kandi bagaharanira kwerekana ko buri wese afite agaciro ndetse no kubwirana amagambo arimo imitoma itomoye.
